stranger danger

I met up with a good friend this afternoon at our favorite splash pad.  We sat and talked while we watched our children try to beat the summer heat.  Then we then noticed something disturbing, a super creepy man sitting alone drinking a beer watching our kids play.  It's 11am on a weekday, I might add. 

We're talking straight out of a movie, stereo typical child predator looks here. 

For those who know me well, you know I am the last person to think bad of someone and will always defend the underdog.  In fact, I kept doing it with him too.  "Oh, he's probably some one's Grandpa." 

But deep down I just had a feeling in my gut I couldn't ignore.

We were determined to out stay him or to get enough courage confront him.  After 2 hours he finally left.  Alone. 

Was he there innocently watching children play?  Or was he a predator?  I'll never know.  One thing that I know for sure is that I need to teach my children about stranger danger....before it's to late. 

Teaching kids stranger danger

remember my kids are only 4 & 6

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  Teach them what a stranger is!  Seems obvious enough, but I have been teaching my children to be nice and polite and in return they don't know a stranger and will chat it up with anyone.  It's also a good idea to ask them what a stranger looks like.  Gavin told me a stranger looks like a ninja. 
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  Visuals!  Print out color pages and read books.  Remember McGruff?  He's still around and is a great online research tool for parents and kids. 
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  Role Play!  I don't want to scare my children but to empower them.  I want to give them the tools where hopefully they won't become a victim.  My boys love playing pretend and they thought it was so much fun that Mommy was "playing" with them. 

We dressed up and took turns being the stranger trying to trick the kid.  As a parent it's a little scary that your child falls for the lost dog or candy trick every time...even though it's just pretend.  Hopefully if we keep this up they will eventually get it and recognize the danger if it happens in real life.

It's a shame that the world isn't a safe place for our children.  I hope and pray that they will never come in contact with anyone wanting to hurt them. 

Family Watch Dog is a FREE website that you can put in your zip code and see all the registered sex offenders in your area.  I was horrified by the number in my area.  You can click on the map and see a picture of each offender and their crime. 

Disclaimer:  Not all registered sex offenders are child molesters or violent offenders, I've heard of people being put on the list for "indecent exposure" because they  peed in a parking lot leaving a bar.  BUT I did find a man in MY NEIGHBORHOOD charged with "lewd act with a child".  Yeah.  That's enough to freak this Momma out! 

Have you begun to talk to your child about stranger danger?  What have you done to teach them about child predators?  I would love to get more ideas from real moms!

**I realize that 90% of child predators are people you children already know!  Like a coach, teacher, or family member.  That's a whole other subject....and frightening one at that...

Stylin'

We've got style!

Yes, we do!

We've got style,

How 'bout you?

When you see us around town, no judging.  My 2 older children dress themselves.

Oh, Zander.  That is an Incredible Hulk muscle costume under his clothes.  He wants people to think he's buff.  He's outside skateboarding right now in this get up.  I told him it's hot, but he's determined to prove me wrong.  This is coming from the kid who refused to wear shorts last summer....even to the splash pads. 

Homemade Disinfectant Wipes

I was running Gavin's bath water last night.  Before he got into the tub he used the bathroom....well, sort of.  He was at least a foot away from the toilet arching his back trying to stream his urine into the bowl. 

"Scoot up Gavin!"  I ordered.

"I don't want to step on pee,"  he argued.

"There's not pee on the floor."  I assured him.

"Yeah there is.  I always accidently pee on the floor." 

 Boys are just gross....awfully cute, especially this particular one, but still gross. 

That's where these awesome homemade disinfectant wipes come in handy.  The disinfectant wipes you buy at the store are very pricey...not to mention what's in them?  Do you feel comfortable handing a container of them to your four year old and tell him to clean the bathroom?  Not me. 

I use the same concept as homemade baby wipes to make these disinfectant wipes.  Check out my tutorial here. on "Or So She Says."

Here's what you need:

Roll of paper towels (I like Viva) cut in half

cup of vinager

1/2 cup of water

about 10 drops of your favorite essential oil....I like lemon oil for these wipes

Tall tupaware or other container....a large coffee can would work great.

Cut your roll of paper towels in half, like this. 

Pull the cardboard center out.  You will pull the wipes from the middle like this.

Place paper towel half in container.  Mix ingredients and poor over towels.  Put an airtight lid on and let set for about 30 minutes.  It's that easy. 

These are a non toxic alternative to those pricey commercial anti-bacterial wipes.  I wouldn't go as far to call them "green" because you are using paper towels but I really love the convenience of them. 

Gavin can now clean up his own pee off the floor and the toilet seat.  (Just be sure to tell your children to throw them in the trash not flush them!)

frightening revelation

I was at the mall today and met a man on the elevator with 5 kids....two of which looked like identical twins. 

"You have twins I see."  I said to make conversation, making sure I didn't ask the most annoying and obvious question...do you have twins? 

"Triplets actually."  He then introduced me to his family which consisted of a 6 year old boy, triplet 4 year olds (a girl and identical boys) and a 3 year old girl.  Did I mention he was alone?  No mom in sight.  This guy needs an award of some sort, and possibly teach classes at the local community college for other fathers.  I gave my respects and admiration and was on my way. 

I kept running in to them throughout our day.  I was in total awe of how well behaved his children were.  They followed behind him and kept together.....that's when it hit me.  He had no stroller. 

This is a frightening thought for me.  The stroller is my sense of control in public places.  My twin two year old's are safely buckled in and I have a handle for each older boy to hang onto.  The very idea of not using one scares the heck out of me! 

I didn't even realize that I am on my way OUT of the stroller phase.  I'm gonna have to get one of those ropes with handles that the former Jon & Kate +8 use....even though I know Zander will boycott that idea because he's way to cool. 

I'm also contemplating the possible scares of having two 5 year old's in strollers.  Do you think it will have the same social akwardness as breastfeeding a 5 year old? 

Dear Zander,

I can't believe you are already six years old!  You will always be my baby boy....but you have such an old soul.  You have a big responsibility being the oldest of four children....and you take that job very seriously.  You are such a good big brother to your baby sisters.  You love to "read" to them and everyday sit with them in the bathroom determined to potty train them.

You are a very sensitive boy and do what is expected of you.  Because of this, you pretty much get whatever you want.  All you have to do is say, "Please Mom?" and look at me with your big brown eyes and I melt and do whatever you ask. 

You are 6 going on 16.  Style is very important to you.  You like skinny jeans and converse and want to dress like a teenager.  You keep begging me so you can take break dancing lessons.  You refuse to wear baggy jeans or cargo pants.  You think "fat shoes" and long shorts makes you look like Sponge Bob. 

A few weeks go you killed a spider outside and came in to brag about it.  I informed you that the killing was unnecessary and explained that spiders helped control the insect population and next time to let the spiders living outdoors live.  An hour later, we were driving down the road and you began to sob uncontrollably.  I asked you what as wrong and you defended your spider killing. 

"I love all animals Mom!  I am a protector of all animals.  That spider I killed was going to kill other bugs!  Defenseless bugs like beetles!  I love beetles!  I protect bugs!!" 

Zander, you were an emotional mess.  And I love you for it.  That's just an example of what a thoughtful, sensitive boy you are. 

You love to fight and wrestle with your brother.  You are kind of mean to him and like to torture him and tattle and get him in trouble.  He makes you so mad when he mimics what you say and follows you around.  He admires you so much....but he just gets on your nerves.  You're lucky that I can totally relate, because I'm also the oldest child.

My first love.  My first born.  I never knew what love was until I saw you come out of me....yes, the doctor put a giant mirror "down there" and I saw you with my very own eyes come out of me!  It was frightening and amazing all rolled into one.  While you were still inside me (TMI?!) I grabbed you under your arms and "delivered" you myself and brought you to my chest.  It was the most magical experience I've ever had.  All the pain from the 14 hour natural labor vanished.  You made everything worth it. 

I love you with all my heart and can't wait to see what adventures we have in the next year.  You are every mother's dream. 

Happy Birthday Zander!

Love, Mom....because Momma is for babies...

Zander's Birthday Party

Earlier this year I announced to the world my stand against big birthday parties.  Don't misunderstand me.  A child's birthday should be special.  But let's get real, is the party for our child or to impress the guests? Is it necessary to shell out three hundred plus dollars on your kid's birthday?  Hmmm....or maybe I feel this way because I don't have an extra $300 in the budget to blow on a party?  Whatever the answer is, I declared last year, "NEVER AGAIN!"

Instead I wanted to make my child's birthday special by taking that money that would be spent for a birthday party and do something.  Being a family of six on one income we don't get to do a lot of stuff that smaller families do....like go eat at a fun restaurant then go to an amusement park or movie.  That was the plan....yeah, my kids didn't like it.

Zander, turning 6, kept talking about his birthday party....making plans....he wanted it to be at Big Splash, or Laser Tag, or Bounce U....like all his friends.  The truth is, we can't afford that.  I tried to persuade him that instead of a party we, as a family, could go to Big Splash or one of those other places, but he insisted that he wanted to invite his friends. 

Call me a liar or call me a push over, we ended up having a party.  But seriously, it was small compared to other extravagant parties.  

We spent an afternoon hand making our invitations and then delivered them to the neighborhood kids.  We bought a blow up pool at Aldi for only $16 and bought 4 boxes of sherbet popsicles for less then $2 apiece.  We had a couple of slip n slides (which we received as gifts earlier in the season) set up as well. 

For lunch we served Zander's favorite lunch....PB&J, Cheetos, grapes and pink lemonade. 

Cheeto hands!

When the kids got hot they came inside for craft time.  I bought visors from the Dollar Tree...3 for a $1!  They decorated them with glitter, stickers, and such....which I already had. 

All in all, the birthday was super fun and super cheap.  I decorated the inside of my house with left over luau stuff from a party several years ago. 

Pure joy.

One little boy said, "This is the best birthday party ever! " 

Best.  Feeling.  Ever. 

You don't have to spend a lot of money to have a fun birthday party.  I seriously believe that even IF we could afford the big party that we would opt NOT to have one....we're just minimalist like that.  On the other hand, I'm thankful that his friends have parties at all those fun places so my child can experience them....

Obama Rice

We're at the grocery store yesterday and Gavin asks, "Mom, can we pleeeeze get the Barack Obama rice today?" 

I ignored him, and continued to read the ingredients on a box of couscous. 

He continued.  "Please mom.  You never buy Barack Obama rice.  Can we please get Barack Obama rice?" 

I finally realized what he was asking.  "What in the world are you talking about?"

He points up at a box of Uncle Ben's rice.  Really?  wth?  I was cracking up.  President's are on money....why not rice boxes?  

This is coming from the same kid who saw a picture of Bin Laden and shouted "Santa!"  Far from it kid.  I'm trying not to read to much into his horrible observations.